Here we are in the dead of winter and I am left with no excuses for slacking on my blog posts. Not that anyone would actually read my dribble or give a flying monkey-crap what I have to say, but it's my blog and I really don't care. It's all about me here people. I was recently asked why I have a blog in the first place and my response was to empty my brain of all the words crowding up space in my head. After all, there is not a lot of extra space left because of all the useless information pertaining to bikes and the rides that I dream about dancing around in there.
So as I was going through my morning ritual of sipping delicious coffee and reading other blogs where people make money and actually have a dedicated readership, a light went off. Well maybe no one cares about my blog because the name is (insert yawn), kinda boring. Wheel Life- what does that mean anyway? This could be a blog about cars, shopping carts, wheelchairs, baby joggers or roller skates with a name like that. The name needs some oomph, magical power or some secret message.
With that said I would like to throw out some new names.
1. Chain driven - because, well bikes can't go anywhere without a chain. Duh!
2. The Squeaky Drivetrain - like fingers on a chalkboard to bike geeks, nothing gains more attention than the audible screams of chain without proper lubrication.
3. Vintage Toe-Baskets - why do people call them toe-clips anyway? Baskets hold more than clips and throwing vintage in there make the name much more marketable.
4. Clipless - of course this is the antithesis of toe-baskets and could inevitably increase your power-ratio and efficiency.
5. Handlebars and Brake levers- I like to hang on and go, and stop if the need arises. Besides, I don't ride a fixie and my huge cycling legs won't fit into skinny jeans.
6. The Grease is always Greener - I think there is a certain truth to the adage things look better from the other side of the fence. It's human nature to suffer in some fashion.
7. Just Riding Along - this is what happens the moment before the wheels come off.
8. L' Arriere du Peloton - because I am always off the back.
9. Amor Bicicletta - ahh bike love, and it has a nice European flair which gives it much more credibility.
10. The Well-lubed Chamois - I bought stock in Assos chamois butter this year 'cause it literally has saved my ass.
11. Chamois without Panties - please do not wear your undies whilst in bike shorts. It hurts me on a deep level. I see those lines on your butt and if you think it's gross to go underpantsless, well buy a freakin' washing machine.
As you can see I took it to eleven, because these days top tens are all the rage and far be it from me to jump on the bandwagon. I would like to ask of the six of my readers to vote on their favorite. And remember, your choice should be influenced by what would look good on a cycling kit.